It breaks my heart

Saw so many trucks 🚚 and wished you’d know am around… telepathically. So I sat down next to the window (strategically) so that you don’t miss me at all.

Closed my eyes and called out your name and counted from 10 backward. As I closed my eyes your face came to me. With that bright smile you always have and you kissed me on my forehead and said “surprise”. My eyes lit up as I smiled back and held your head to make sure that it wasn’t a dream 

But then I opened my eyes yours were missing.

Don’t know what’s more depressing, the fact that I called out to you hoping that the love  I have would make you realize that I need you; or the fact that everyone in the truck came in pairs as if Noah had shared a memo and I never got it. I kept hoping that the other travel partners would come in late (cause that would mean more time for you to come to your senses and address my plea. Or at least time for you to close your eyes and track my aura that was shouting with desperation.

The love I have for you made me wake up at night just to have a dance with you. The love that we share works in such a way that when our eyes lock in all we can do is not speak but speak at the same time. The feelings that ooze out when I sit next to you make me pray that you’d never get to know just how much it hurts that you are already with someone else. That bitch doesn’t know what she has and I can’t take you from her cause that will hurt her (as if I care).

So I’ll always hold 

My fort 

and have my fingers crossed and hope that you’ll realize that I am trying to reach out to you telepathically and all I want is for you to hold my hand and squeeze it and say “I know and I feel the same way”.

For now, I close my eyes and try again to count to 11 this time around.